Life as it once was.. Is no more

As I sit down to write this, my mind is mentally blocking all of the things I was supposed to do while my two babies are sleeping. Two babies.. we now have two kids. Two beings who rely completely on us for their well being. So my view on life and everything in it has been turned up side down and spun around in a million different directions. Although the entrepreneur lifestyle and business is still very apparent in the way we live, our decisions are much more calculated and thought out, and rethought because it is no longer just us. The word "work" has taken on a whole new meaning for me. I have decided to take some time being just Mommy. And although I wasn't completely sure how it would go, I have never been more sure of a decision in my life. Raising my kids. The outside business world in no longer, it is the fishing lure world and the kid world. I suspect just the way God intended it to be at least for now. Even though I am not working outside of the home, I still play my part being a sounding board and a second pair of eyes for my husband and his creation. It has now blossomed into a machine, that if fed correctly produces the most fantastic end product which is success. But along with success and climbing up that mountain, there are always storms, rocks in the way, animals waiting for you to fall or those waiting to try and knock you off. This past year of our lives has been an incredible struggle. The animals are out, and the storms have been severe. But as we have seen so many times throughout this journey, there must be storms to encounter a rainbow. There will always be waves. Some we recover from quickly and others knock us down for longer. But you better believe that my husband and I are the people when we get knocked down, we train and train hard and then get back up not only stronger than ever, but with a vengeance. And you can count on this, we are already teaching our children the very same thing. So as our story continues to unfold before us, we are training, we are growing stronger and leaner, we are adding muscle to our team, and we will continue to listen to our direction. And although life as it once was is no more, the direction we are headed is exactly where I want to be.

Barely Scratching the Surface

Looking back to my last post in March it seems like a few years have gone by since then! Both professionally and personally it has been one hell of a ride. From a huge chaotic move experience to our insane journey with LL and back home to our beautiful little mess who is growing so quickly sometimes its hard to wrap my mind around.
So in the midst of harnessing a very strong willed 2 year old, the reality of Livingston Lures and the constant change of our new home, I have decided to make a conscience effort to choose "happy" every morning when I wake up. Sounds like such a simple task, but let me tell you there are days my eyes are forced open by the alarm clock and I just want to lay in that bed FOREVER. No people, no husband, no daughter, no business, just pillows, blankets and sleep. But once the coffee is poured and seeps into my blood stream my head clears and I am choosing "happy". Now to keep that "happy" all day is one huge pill to swallow. One phone call, text, email, social blah blah can knock that happy right out the window. And that's where God steps in. Cause Lord knows I am not able to do this without His help. As I write this blog, I am sitting here wearing a tshirt that I wish I could wear every day. It says, "All I need today is a little bit of coffee and a whole lot of Jesus" Isn't that the truth. These days are constantly filled with bustle. I read something the other day about a little girl who asked her mom why adults always tell each other how busy they are. A competition of who's busier. I just love kids. I love to sit and talk to them and hear their answers.. so honest and innocent. But as I thought about it, I do that ALL THE TIME. Oh we are always soo busy. I think it's time to change this way for me and me house. My sweet child has really helped put that into perspective. When I am pushing her too hard so I can finish my errands, when she HAS to eat her lunch NOW so I can get things done, when I drag her all over town to complete my tasks, I will look over at her and know it's time to slow down. There are so many different aspects of our lives. When people ask me what my husband does and I explain he has a fishing lure company, most look a little confused. You guys and fishing? Yep that is right. And even though at this very moment that does take up the majority of my husbands time these days, that barely scratches the surface of who we really are in this life. With summer coming to a close and one last major tourney on the agenda this year.. I think it's time to really start revealing to ourselves and the world just what else is below that surface.

Don't Wake Me From This Dream- Scratch that Wake Me up.. This is REAL LIFE!

Two weeks ago exactly today I lay in my bed sick as dog. I mean I did not move from that bed the entire day. Two days later I gathered myself enough energy to bid farewell to my sweet husband who had barely recovered from the same bug days before. He was off to the largest bass fishing event of the year. With our energy not up to par and so many other things happening at the moment, I didn't have time to build it up in my head like I had done in years past. But this was a world different from years past. LL is on the map, not just locally but nationally. There wasn't just a small 10X10 tent set up to sell as many baits as 2 people could physically manage. Not only was there a display that I pictured in my dreams, but clothing and gear and pro's and famous industry reps. And to just take it over the top, 3 guys who represent LL would be fishing in this epic tourney. Which for LL, that was all new. As I watched my husband drive away with tears in my eyes selfishly thinking I would be on my own for the next 5 days, I remember him clearly saying, "Pray that one of our guys makes the top 3 of the championship. That's all we need is the top 3." Ok I thought, what really are the chances of this happening. But I prayed anyway, not only because my husband asked, but because "we" NEEDED this win for 100's of reasons (we meaning everyone involved with LL). Well after my work week began to slow and things on the home front were winding down, I decided to do a little research of my own. It seems it was all very possible with these 3 guys competing, but I strongly believe in the sport of fishing anything is possible. The days passed and I would get a little report from my husband. I like to know the vibe and energy of these events since I'm not physically there. The last day, only 1 of the pros associated with LL made it to the end. It happens to be hands down my favorite guy, Randy Howell. Just a genuine, God fearing amazing character who stands next to a lady who radiates this pure light, together a powerhouse. After meeting them last year in Vegas, I began following Mrs. Howell on FB. So I decided to check out her page to see if I could gather any info on how her husband was doing out there. Something someone posted on her page, literally took me away from my breakfast table to get my iPad to try and get more info. Something magical had happened, all I could find out was that Howell had some sort of history making morning and had gone from 11th place to 1st place "unofficially". I was wired. Texting and checking. I found some link where you could follow the activity of all the fishermen. It was updated every 5 minutes. I began to get more info from my hubs, the energy coming from him just thru text messages made me want to be next to him more than anything in the world. This win would make it to the top of my husbands list of best times in his ENTIRE life. It would mean that something he created inside of his head and brought to market would be validated through this sweet man winning the world championship. It would mean all those years of sacrifice, work and perseverance would be worth it. All of the non believers who gave up, who thought it was a crazy pipe dream would be proved wrong as Randy stood there with Livingston smack dab center of his chest. I watched shaking, praying, pacing, until the very end. I did not realize how long it would actually take for the results so I ran to the grocery store. I turned it on my phone plugged in my headphones and watched him win the 2014 Bassmaster Classic as I paid the cashier at the grocery store, tears running down my face. He took the whole thing. First place, a champion. This stand up man and his beautiful family stood there on that huge platform and gave it all to God. It was pure magic, devine magic. There was no such thing called luck involved, that was God smiling down on us saying I have heard your prayers for all these years, and now is the time. I can't speak for the Howell family, only mine and this dream we feel like we are living in thru his win has changed our lives. We did not win a trophy or any amount of money, we did not train and fish and compete in this tournament. We did not win the title of world champion. Randy Howell did. And he happen to do it throwing Livingston Lures. You know when you hear that cliche phrase "we are living a dream", well who would of thought this South Texas girl and her inventrepreneur husband would see the day.


"Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up." Galations 6:9

"All of our Dreams come true if we have the courage to pursue them" -Walt Disney

A New Season Begins

As the middle of February approaches this means fishing season has officially begun. Two years ago this meant packing up the LL truck and hitting the road. A few days here, a couple more there, then back home to refuel, restock then back at it again. Well that was 2 years ago you see. Now a days things are quite different. Although the fishing season has definitely begun, there is a different season change in this ole house. The husband bustles to trainings and meetings and now the beginning of the must-do tournaments while the little and I try and keep our heads on straight! Things are changing so quickly with the business that if you stand still for too long you are completely left in the dust. I get alerts when anyone on the web mentions LL and it's crazy how much talk happens each and every day. I saw a commercial the other day for Cadillac that mentions Amazon, Disney, Mattel, huge companies who began in American garages. I swear my ears heard them say at the end, "Livingston Lures started in a garage." We are right there. Strike while the iron is hot.. well that saying just taps the surface of the impact that is being made in the fishing industry. Exciting, nerve racking, exhausting, and rewarding are just what falls out of my thoughts when I put it on paper.

And as for our mini, her change happened just last week. She began a whole new adventure. Mothers Day out to be exact. Wheww.. that was a big one for this fam. The little jewel of our lives was now going to be handed over to someone that is not related to us in any way. AND spending all day, eating, sleeping and learning there after being with JUST us for almost 2 years. Impossible right?! That was hard for me to wrap my mind around. But it is time. We learn that sometimes the hardest things to do in life happen to be the right things to do. I couldn't think too much about it or I would change my mind and cancel the whole thing! So I ripped off the bandaid of insecurity and clipped her wings. She won't fly too far just yet, just hops far enough out to give my heart a good check up.

So to another season of our lives. To the good, the bad and anything in-between. To letting go of both babies, the business and the sweet little soul we call daughter. Letting them both make their mark in the world each day growing stronger and more independent. I feel like this may be my very favorite season yet, but that is to be determined… praying I will keep it together long enough to find out!

Grow.. 2014

Well a new year is officially here. The words I will do it next year have landed into my lap. Although I didn't think I would be, I'm ready. I love that we get to "start over" each year. Like being cleansed and reset. Reflecting over the past year today, I am very thankful. So many milestones, accomplishments, and dreams becoming a reality. Life lessons, doors closed, aspects fading into the distance and more doors opening. My sweet little girl growing so beautifully into a person I could not even dream up. Many 1st steps for our angel will never ever be forgotten. 2013 was an eye opening year for this family. 2014 will be a year of growing. In every aspect of the word.. we will grow together and individually. Always for the greater good of us, our little family.

I will be feeding my soul to grow this year towards the woman I was made to be. Seeking more from God, I plan to learn to slow down and be silent for moments to appreciate the full beauty of my completely full life. Life experiences will chisel away the me from 2013 and form an improved me of 2014. There are always growing pains and I am very aware that those will slap me right off of my soul feeding adventure. But we are no strangers to adversity and I will let nothing stand in the way of what I want and need to accomplish this year. Lots of "must dos" you know the typical.. get back into shape, pay off debt. But so many many more significant resolutions have been written, boarded and visualized.

2014.. ready or not.. I have a feeling you are going to be the year I talk about down the road, as the year our lives were changed forever.

This is a picture of the chinese lantern we sent into the sky at midnight… Amen!!!

Remembering, Learning, Aging

Today is 9/11. This life we live in is just an insane adventure. I would just like to say that. Up and down, life and death, tragedies and accomplishments. And every other single event inbetween. There are times that I just get so wrapped up in my world ungratefully complaining, talking about nonsense, taking my life for granted. Then days like today hit me square in the face. I need that. Today it is the 12th anniversary since 9.11. The day that we will always take a moment and just literally remember. I specifically think about the families that lost someone. The ones who are left each year reliving it. I definitely remember to add them to my prayers on this day. Forever changing our country. The old days are gone. Easy airports, New York City, mostly everything about our country was altered that day. Weird to think and about and to the core crazy it went down like that. Honoring the people who had any part on this day is the smallest act of gratitude I could possibly do. Yes.. I will for the rest of my life take 9.11 to remember.

Also on this day 80 years ago my Grandmother, my mothers mother was born. 80 years old. We will all get there. God willing of course. This one lady is such a piece of our family puzzle. She is my Panamanian Grandma and I think 80 years of having her a part of this world is definitely worth celebrating. We will be having a bash for sure.

What a day today was.. remembering, reflecting and appreciating where I am and who is around. I am not getting any younger, time seems to be winning as usual so days like this are good for me. They shake me back to the real world and make me refocus my energy on what this deal is all about. Theres alot happening in this world and under this roof itself.. theres some magic brewing, blessed.

I Don't Believe in Coincidences

Being at the right place at just the right time.. possibly. Predestined lives.. maybe. But pure coincidence no way. This past weekend we took a trip to be a part of something I had no idea I would get to experience. I happen to be married to someone who I love to my deepest core, but would never understand until I had it. Not like the movies love because they never truly show all the facets there are. But an immeasurable love. Much like the love of a child..but I am drifting to an entire topic of it's own. So back to this love.. Since we have it and hold it so very close to our hearts, the husband and I love nothing more than for everyone to find that sort of love. Specifically those we cherish.

This is how it started: I got a text from a person who I share this crazy easy bond with. Someone who has a light that has always been a part of my life.. near and very far but always there. This lady has overcome the world.. you name it.. she has conquered it. It was time this friend found her match. I had known this man she spoke of was different. Her voice was different, her decisions seemed different, her whole being seemed different. And if you asked me what different meant, I would never be able to describe. Mind you, I have never ever met this man before. For me, I always try to give the benefit of the doubt in every single relationship. There is a reason I am with who I am with and others chose their companions... period. Sometimes I understand the match and sometimes I will never know why on earth two individuals are together. But there again, anyone in the world could peek into my life and think the exact same.. the bottom line is I know without a doubt. So the text came through about a month ago. My friend had decided to take the plunge. They decided they wanted to be married and would be doing it in aprox 3-4 weeks. I immediately felt the need to be there. Even if no one else showed up, I wanted to be there. But the magic begun here. I looked at my husband who was traveling the whole month of August and told him my sweet friend will be getting married and here is the date. Without even flinching, asking when, where, what.. he said we will be there. I was a little confused at his reaction myself because he wasn't even checking his calendar. But just that little action and how well him and I are connected I knew he felt it too. We HAD to be there.

Flying in we had no idea what to expect and that was actually a breathe of fresh air. We were just playing it by ear.. whatever the plans we were there. So as we were awaiting the night time plans, visiting with another dear friend the soon to be bride and groom swooped in quickly before getting their kids settled. One quick hello and I knew this was going to be good. The night before the big day came and went.. people celebrated with them, drinks were flowing. My favorite part was that we were the last 4 standing, (or kind of standing at this point) having breakfast at 2am in a Denny's without a care in the world other than sharing that delicious grease with these two people. After spending just a short couple of hours I got "them". Their perfectly imperfect bond that will hold them until the end.

The next day it's wedding time.. feeling the affects of the previous evening.. but making a decision that I will overcome with a little caffeine and food. And it's time. We are heading to the venue they have picked, in a bus filled with a small, very random group of individuals and I just looked around and felt pure happiness in this little bus. As we walk into this cool little eclectic art studio it began. These feelings of magic and just plain love. The love between the people gathered, the love for my friend, and just different families gathered to watch this family become one unit. I have never been to a wedding and felt that. Mostly because they are normally big weddings, you talk to the people you know and there are so many people gathered you miss a lot of the intimate details. Everything felt so casual, no rushing around, no stressful time crunches, just doing their thing. At last, the ceremony begins. I had offered to video because I knew they needed this moment captured on tape. I am so glad I did. I stood behind watching this family up there in the most perfect lighting, uniting with their 3 girls standing next to them thru this camera lens...incredible. The tears just began falling.. I could not stop them. I looked over at my husband sitting in the front row all by himself literally and fell in love all over again. After peeling my eyes off of him, I looked around the room and it seems I wasn't the only one that was completely touched by this love. From where I was standing there was a whole lot of emotion. I loved everything about these 48 hours of magic. The love shared, the memories made, the bonds tightened, this was definitely no coincidence. We were meant to be in that very moment no doubt.. for them, for us and every glimpse of hope that pure love is alive and well.
Congratulations Mr. and Mrs. and thank you for more than you might ever know.